It’s easy to place value on material things.
To cherish the shoes. The car. The house. The job. The money.
But there’s something more valuable than all the gold in the world.
It’s our relationships.
Access to food and shelter, fulfilling work and even those divine, pointy-toed shoes, all starts with building good, strong relationships.
Whether that’s on the home front with your friends and family, loved ones and significant others. Or on the professional front with your colleagues and customers, mentors and suppliers.
Strong relationships are based on open communication. That means trust, respect, honesty, humility, mindfulness, and an acceptance of our differences.
Nurturing connections with other people is like amassing treasure. Why? Because relationships open doors. They create the opportunity for freedom.
And the value we place on achieving freedom is priceless.
Tony Robbins highlights the supreme value of relationships in this quote from his book “Awaken the Giant Within“:
“The greatest resource is a relationship, because it opens doors to every other resource you need.”
As Tony wisely points out, access to freedom and opportunity starts with building relationships.
But to build good relationships with others, your relationship with yourself needs to be whole too. And instead of looking to others to fill any holes within us, we need to do it ourselves.
How do we build good, strong relationships with ourselves?
By loving ourselves and feeling worthy of ourselves. (For who we are, not what we own).
Because when we feel loved, we feel like we are enough, and that makes us feel secure.
When we feel secure, we feel strong enough to give of ourselves to others, without needing anything in return.
It’s common to seek love and security in material things. But those rewards are short lived without truly, deeply loving yourself, as you are, without those things.
What’s the best way to create valuable relationships with others?
You don’t need to be an alchemist to create gold connections. It’s quite simple really:
- Be open, genuine and humble – willing to give more than you need or expect.
- Offer kindness and attention – whether that’s advice, support or brightening someone’s day with an unexpected compliment.
- Convey goodwill, compassion and respect – value people based on their being human, not on their job title or role in society (your boss is no more important than your postman in the bigger scheme of things)
While you may need to adapt your approach based on the differences inherent in each connection opportunity, being consistent in your openness is the foundation. And then it’s just practice, practice, practice. Keep working at it.
Just like we invest our money so that it compounds in value, we need to grow the value of our relationships by nurturing them.
What if you valued your personal and professional connections as your greatest treasure?
Puts all those material things into perspective, doesn’t it? They mean nothing without the love, respect, friendship and understanding of others.
Want to learn more about building stronger relationships?
I highly recommend you read ANY of Tony Robbins’ books.
And, if you’re short on reading time, here’s a few good blog resources to get you started:
- 9 Habits of People Who Build Extraordinary Relationships by Jeff Haden for Inc.
- Building Good Relationships by Mind Tools.
- 7 Key Habits For Building Better Relationships by Harvey Deutschendorf for Fast Company.
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